I always feel strange when the summer begins. It’s all the happiness in the air, the feeling of those lazy days that are just waiting for me that make me feel like this. I mean, yeah, I want to just sit and do nothing, but I know I’ll get bored of all hat free time. And as homesick as I am now, I’m sure I’ll get sick and tired of my quiet little mountain town.

And I’m feeling just like I did last year in this period. I have exams, I try to study but instead I read or sleep, I listen to the same music, I’m thinking about the same problems. It’s like a circle - like I’m living the same life over and over again. I don’t like that fact that last year’s memories are so vivid. And it wasn’t even a great year; at least not the summer period. Ah, whatever…

Surprisingly, I’m friends with Radu again. It’s great to speak to him again and yes, I’m grateful that he has forgiven me for being such a bitch. I sometimes still am, but we are so familiar with one another that we don’t let those small things upset us. I can tell him anything and everything and he does the same. And I’m glad he’s not in love with me anymore; we’re so good friends because the feelings have vanished. We know each other damn well, we accept each other, especially with our faults - that’s all that matters. I can hardly wait to go to Baia Mare and eat ice cream with him. Of course he’s paying! I know, I know, some things never change

Ah well… that’s all for today. Or maybe not… depends on the mood I’ll be in tonight. I reaaaaaaly don’t feel like studying… I’ll watch some Garfield, take a nap, play with uRMa, talk to Mum, get lost in a good book and maybe I’ll read something for my exam sometime tonight.

I’ve missed the fat bastard!

Samponul pe care-l folosesc miroase a nustiuce, care-mi aduce aminte de nustiuce
Gelul de dus miroase si el a nustiuce, care-mi aduce aminte de nustiuce
Deodorantul miroase a nustiuce, care-mi aduce aminte de nustiuce
Imi tot miros cand parul, cand pielea si imi aduc aminte de nustiuce

Muzica pe care o ascult imi aduce aminte de nustiuce
Versurile imi aduc aminte de nustiuce
Ritmul imi aduce aminte de nustiuce

Si ma sperie faptul ca exista atatea lucruri care
La un moment dat au insemnat ceva pentru mine
Iar acum sunt doar “nustiuce”.

It has been a horrible week. I couldn’t study for my exams and although I did pretty ok at the English grammar exam, I don’t think I’ll pass the one at the history of the UK. Tough luck! Anyways, I still have 3 more exams and I still don’t feel like studying.

What’s worse, is that I’m homesick. I feel like packing my bags and go home; no looking back, no feeling sorry I left Bucharest, no nothing. This time I’m blaming it on the summer. It’s that time of the year when all I want is to wake up late in the morning, take lots of showers, read all day, eventually go out for a walk or a beer with My Maria. It’s that time of the year when I don’t feel like eating anything except sweets, when I savour an ice cream/day, when I get back to drinking Coke like an addict. It’s that time of the year when I listen mostly to Belle and Sebastian, when I dye the tops of my hair blue or orange, when I get to bed early in the morning and I don’t feel guilty about it.

What’s worst, is that I can’t control my feelings. When I’m extremely happy I jump around and I smile on an on, I laugh and I talk [a bit too much]. When I’m sad I cry and I refuse do to things; I just sit there idle and feel miserable. And when I’m angry I feel like smashing something… and that’s exactly what I did yesterday. I smashed my phone. I threw it at the one of the walls in my room. The phone’s mostly ok, but I can’t hear properly what people are saying. I told mum about it and she said it’s ok. I’ll buy a new phone when I go home. I’m glad she’s trying to understand me when I’m having these bad days and she doesn’t get mad at me when I can’t control my anger.

Today I’ve been invited to Snagov at the Old Lady Who Gives Me Food son’s house. Well, they are a pretty rich family and their house is totally awesome. No, make that breath-taking. And the garden… wow! And the lake… tripple wow! It was a pleasant visit, but I wouldn’t like to live like that. It was all too luxurious for me. It doesn’t mean I couldn’t get used to that kind of life, but it simply isn’t something that I wish to have.

I just keep on daydreaming about Baia Mare, my parents, its quiet streets, its people, the park, my friends there, the bestest ice cream in the world, Tom and Jerry, laziness, my rocking chair… yeah, I’m homesick alright!

I’m sorry I’m ethusiastic about meeting Romanian authors; authors which I really like. I’m sorry these people really mean something to me; I’m sorry I think they’re special. I’m sorry I talk this much. I’m sorry I gesticulate. I’m sorry I know how to be happy. I’m sorry I let my happiness show. I’m sorry my happiness and enthusiasm pisses you off. I’m sorry I’m child-like and I easily get carried away. I’m sorry I’m not the way you’d like me to be.

I just love it when in the mornings we wake up at about the same time. I pat her, she purrs, I ask her “are we going to get up or what?” she gives me a very sleepy look and them we get back to sleep

She’s ok now. Well, she’s her old self: jumping and scratching, following me around and biting my fingers But today she did something extremely gross. I don’t know how come, but I found a grasshopper in the balcony. I have no idea how the poor thing got there [I’m on the 3rd floor] or for how long he had been there; as I was trying to catch it and set it free, uRMa came, chased it and ate it!!!! She ate the grasshopper!!! It was horrible! Bleah!!! This cat is nuts!

How could I’ve been so stupid and why the bloody hell did I neglect putting a net on the balcony window?! Today was a terrific day until… my uRMa fell from the 3rd floor!!!!! When I saw her down there, my heart stopped beating… I ran down the stairs and when I reached the place she had fallen, tears came to my eyes… I didn’t know what to do; I didn’t know if it was ok to pick her up, if she had a broken bone, if she had some internal injury or something… and there was blood… she hit her nose, that’s where the blood came from… but she was there… hurt… and I was there too, crying… and I couldn’t do a damn thing for about a minute or two. I was powerless Finally I picked her up and brought her to the apartment and then I started calling people. Thank you, Ona, Mihaela, Patric, Jen and Alexandra for your help. We took her to the vet’s and apparently she doesn’t have anything broken [but when we came back home she was limping a bit ]. The vet gave her some shots, said she was looking ok and that I should bring her in tomorrow as well. Now she’s sleeping and I really hope she’ll be ok

Vic was right when he repeatedly told me I need to grow up Now I know what he meant by that. I said to Puck I’ll take care of uRMa and I failed. I should have taken into consideration every possible detail about what it means to raise a cat. I should have been more watchful, especially knowing that she’s little and very agitated and curious. Now she suffers because of me I need a good slap. I need to grow up and acknowledge that there are things I’m totally responsible for and I can’t escape that responsibility So, please, anyone, just slap me!

As avea nevoie de toate ioi-urile si aaa-urile din lume ca sa pot sa-mi urlu fericirea si tot ar mai fi loc si pentru alte izbucniri necontrolate de fericire. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - imi pare rau, dar nu pot sa tin fericirea asta IMENSA in mine! Pur si simplu nu pot!

Si ce daca nu am inceput dimineata chiar bine, ce-i mare lucru? Minunatiile au venit o data cu cartile de la Polirom. Si desi imi planificasem o dupa-masa linistita in care sa invat, Jen a trebuit sa-mi spuna de bataia cu apa de pe Arthur Veron. Duuuh, evident ca am mers! Ganditi-va la cele mai misto adjective si poate o sa aveti habar cat de bine m-am simtit. In afara de Jen si Fen - care oferea free hugs - nu stiam pe nimeni [ba, si pe Dorin, dar el a plecat repede]. Nu a fost prea multa lume, dar ne-am udat… din cap pana-n picioare! Si a fost minunat! Am facut febra musculara de cat am tot apasat pe tragaciul ala de la pistolul cu apa si mi se scurgea apa pe fata, ia imi era leoarca, dar a fost cea mai misto activitate la care am participat de 1 Iunie! Mi-a fost putin ciuda ca “ai nostri” [Andrei, Subiectiv, Bobby] nu au vrut sa se joace cu noi Nu conteaza, ne-am jucat cu oameni pe care nu-i cunosteam, pe care tot nu-i cunosc, dar cu care m-am simtit minunat!!!

Nu credeam ca poate sa fie si mai misto ziua, eram deja entuziasmata pana peste cap si imi luasem portia de fericire pentru o saptamana intreaga, dar se pare ca Cineva acolo sus ma iubeste si mi-a umplut ziua cu surprize. Cand luam si eu o pauza de la atata udat, ma intalnesc cu Alex, tipul de la Rosia Montana! Vorbisem sa iesim saptamana asta undeva, nu am mai putut, am spus ca poate mergem vineri, nu am mai vorbit si, uite, ne-am intalnit Nu-l mai vazusem de anul trecut din august si am fost placut surpinsa sa vad ca si el m-a recunoscut. Din pacate nu am apucat sa stam prea mult la povesti - deh, fiecare cu ale lui - dar m-a bucurat nespus ca l-am vazut si ca e la fel de misto. Chiar mi-ar placea sa stam odata la o poveste lunga Am ce sa-i spun

Iar pentru ca Patric e de treaba, ne-a dus de Ziua Copilului la KFC! Thank youuuuuu! Iar ca ziua sa fie intr-adevar perfecta, am primit o veste de ultima ora care m-a facut sa sar prin camera de fericire - chiar nu glumesc! - si sa numar orele pana duminica! Iar pentru ca Ionuca ii iubeste mult pe Gramo, incepand de azi i-a “adoptat” pe post de parinti I heart you, Gramo-parents!

Iar Electioneering de la Radiohead e pusa pe repeat, ma pregatesc sa ma duc sa fac mancare ca maine vin Mihaela si Dana. Nu cred ca o sa pot dormi la noapte I’m just so fuckin’ happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

La Gramo gasiti un filmulet din timpul bataii cu apa Eu sunt aia care face cu mana

my stupid typing mistakes

Well, that’s about all regarding the hate chapter. Now I’m happy cause I’m about to go and pick up my books from the post office [Polirom kicks ass!] and My Maria made my day with her unique way of wishing me Happy children’s day Love you, My Maria!!!!!

From My Maria, to her Kid [meaning ME ]

Note to self: don’t write again when you’re angry. You make lots of grammar mistakes!