I have a friend who wants to sell a ticket to the Coldplay concert that will take place on the 23rd of September in Budapest. Anyone out there who might be interested?

Pfff is my new favourite interjection. I use it whenever I can’t find the right words to describe what I’m feeling. This weekend was simply pfff! Pfff in a good way, of course.

It was Thursday noon and there I was, doing something I swore I was never going to do. I spent 6h crammed on the seat of a bus, going to see old friends, a town I feel in love with *yeah, yeah, I know, that stuff happens to me all the time* and a special someone.

The butterflies were present throughout the entire weekend, the bastards didn’t leave me alone, not even for a second. Everything was so normal, so ‘it’s supposed to be this way’. In fact, it was so damn right, that it got quite scary.

I hadn’t been out drinking for ages and there we were, drinking Bloody Marys like there was no tomorrow. I hadn’t had dinner with a he for ages and there we were, enjoying our meal, laughing and talking like we had done that every single day for I don’t know how long. I hadn’t went out with a he, doing stuff, and there we were, strolling through town, taking pictures, visiting a photo exposition.

And she was great friend, letting me stay at her place, waiting for me to come home from town, listening to my enthusiastic blabbering. We spent the nights talking and drinking , an afternoon shopping for sweets, popcorn, earphones, books, a morning at the hairdresser’s and another afternoon walking around the town.

I’m sorry that Mum didn’t understand that it was more important the way I felt there than the time I spent on the road. She got quite annoyed when she heard that the train had a 1h and a half delay, as if it was my fault. I don’t even want to think about the day I’ll have to tell her I’ll be going there more often than she imagines.

It was great seeing the Kid again, talking to Inner, visiting D.’s apartment, watching a movie with the trio and simply smiling all the time. Good times are coming, I’m sure of that

I’m going north this weekend, visiting Targu-Mures again. As usual, she’s the one to save me, give me shelter, food *promise I won’t eat too much* and stand my nonsense.

Hope the Beast will be OK on her own till Sunday. I’m leaving her plenty of water and food and sand. She’ll have the whole apartment only for herself, lucky one.

Still have my bag to pack *oh, so many clothes, so many decisions!*, so I’m off.

It’s gonna be one hell of a weekend

I’m just an evil cold-hearted good for nothing narrow-minded unsympathetic bitch.

I’m giving away my ability to daydream and believe it will actually come true. Does anybody want it?

I just burst into tears when I saw this.

It’s been such a long time

‘God, I hate this bitch!’
‘Are you coming to class next time?’
‘I bloody have to! ‘
‘Your ‘h’s look like ‘g’s.’
‘G g H h… You’re so serious ‘
‘Smiling takes lots of energy - and it gives you wrinkles.’

I promise I’ll write to you these days. I just have to gather all the courge I have in order to do that.

It’s settled: I’m going to Vienna at the end of October Stefan, Marianne, can hardly wait to see you again!

1. He’s the handyman I call whenever there’s something that needs to be repaired around the house. He usually tells me about his nephew, his children, his dog. But this time there were more awkward pauses so I told him about the city I’m going to next week. His smiled and told me he had a lover from that city. They met when they were both working in Israel. The lady was taking care of an old woman, he was working as an electrician. They met and hit it off immediately. They lived together for 7 years. Day after day after day. Then she went to another country and he came home. But last week she also came back in Romania and he went to visit her. For a day. He says it’s true love what they had, what they have. Of course, his family doesn’t know anything about this.

2. She said she had been living there for 10 years. I looked at her husband and asked if he was the reason she moved there. She laughed and said he was her second husband. She was his second wife as well. They both have 2 daughters from the former marriages. They’ve been together only for a year. She likes to be pampered and her ex-husband was the one who made all the money. Also, he beat the shit out of her, whenever he felt like it. Those were 10 years of abuse and violence. She finally got a divorce, but she need a workplace. He, her second husband, was looking to hire a person to sell in his shop and she got the job. They liked each other and he helped her financially. In the end, they got married. She said he married him cause he’s a good man, kind and caring. They seemed happy together.

3. He’s almost 70, she’s almost 60. She’s moved to his country 13 years ago. She’s been his mistress for 11 years. His family doesn’t know a thing about that. She’s even like part of the family. A good friend. He calls her 5-6 times a day and they see each other maybe once a week. He listens to all of her problems, he helps her with money, he takes care of her. He told me something I’ll never forget: ‘It’s so good to know you have somebody who’s always there for you. Somebody who understands you. Too bad I’ve met her 35 years later than I should have.’ Nonetheless, he didn’t give up on his love for her. He’s just like a kid when he’s around her. She makes him truly happy.

Sometimes life’s better, other times it is more unfair than fiction.

Games, changes and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop?

I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together, babe
But we’re not

Macy Gray - I try